A Guardian's Love
by IsabellaCullen86
Summary: Rose accepted it was her duty to protect her charge at all costs. That was until Dimitri Belikov came charging into her life and made her heart begin to ache for things she never knew she wanted. But now doing her duty has left Rose balancing on the cusp of life and death. Will she get the chance to have her own happily ever after, or has she made the ultimate sacrifice?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello there :) So its been a while since I've written anything, between babies and work and, well, life! This is just a little story that has been floating around in my head for a while but I just haven't been able to get it down on paper, so to speak. I hope you enjoy the beginning of this little love story and enough so that you'd be interested in reading more. Any and all mistakes are my own. I don't own Vampire Academy or any of the characters etc...just me putting my own little twist on some parts.**

 **Title:** _A Guardian's Love_

 **Summary:** _She was born and raised to protect her charge at all costs. She had accepted that. That was until Dimitri Belikov came charging into her life and made her heart begin to ache for things she never knew she wanted. Will she get the chance to have her own happily ever after, or will she have to sacrifice it all to keep the ones she loves safe?_

 **Rating:** _MA for later chapters_

 **Thank you in advance for reading :)**

 **A Guardian's Love**

 **Chapter One**

… _ **Rose**_ **...**

EVERYTHING HURT. Rose couldn't remember the last time she'd hurt this much. Then again, she'd never been held captive and tortured by a sadistic strigoi for days, weeks; time was irrelevant now. Glancing down she could see very little other than dried blood covering her exposed limbs and naked torso. Without a doubt this Strigoi was once a psychotic killer, evident from the multiple slices into her skin from the assortment of blades he had slowly tortured her with. He seemed to get great satisfaction from watching her bleed, before he'd drink from her. She didn't want to know what her neck looked like.

"Ah, sleeping beauty awakens at last," came the sickly taunting voice she had heard over and over. "I was starting to get lonely my pet. That smart mouth of yours gets me all worked up."

In all honesty, Rose just wished he would end it. She didn't have the energy for his sick and twisted games anymore. She'd also come to accept the reality that a rescue wasn't likely, especially given how long she'd been here. Hell, if they were smart they'd stay away anyway. The main priority would and should be to keep Lissa safe. Rose had made that very clear.

 _ **FLASHBACK** …_

"Eddie! Take her now! Now! Don't you dare leave her, don't you dare look back!" Rose's voice rang out loudly over the noise of another impending wave of Strigoi forcing their way through the haphazardly barricaded door that she stood against, the bodies of the three strigoi she had just killed laying at her feet.

"What!? No, no I won't let you! Rose!" screamed Lissa's voice from beneath the window that Christian and Mia were frantically trying to open.

"Rose…" said Eddie hesitantly stepping towards her.

"Eddie, you and I both know it's the only way, there's too many and they'll be too fast for the others," she argued as Christian pushed Mia up and through the now shattered window.

"We can't leave her! They'll kill her! We can't! Rose please!" Lissa's screams filled the small room.

"It's my job to protect you and it's the only way I can do that! Please Lissa! I need you to be safe," pleaded Rose before enveloping her in a fierce hug, the doors behind her succumbing to the force of Strigoi behind them a little more.

Holding Lissa's face in her hands, Rose forced her to look at her and listen. "I love you, you know that and I wouldn't leave you if we had any other choice. But we don't. I need you safe Lissa. We both knew this day would come," she rushed on as tears threatened to pour down her face as Lissa's flowed freely. Rose couldn't let her know she was scared out of her mind at the prospect of facing what stood behind those doors alone. "I need you to be strong and I need you to run. I need you to run like hell with Eddie, Christian and Mia and get to Dimitri. He'll protect you, he'll keep you safe," she said pushing her into Eddie's arms.

 _Dimitri…_

"Christian! I need you…I need you to give him this for me," stammers Rose as she pulls the letter she had written weeks ago out of her back pocket, "I need Dimitri to get this, please."

"I'll, I'll make sure, I promise-" his words cut off by the shattering sound of the hinges giving way on the doors behind them.

In an instant Rose was pushing Christian towards the window where Eddie was somehow pushing a hysterical Lissa through into Mia's arms.

"Go now!"

"Rose! Rose!" Lissa's desperate screams filled the room as Rose took one last glance at her friends. Christian looked scared but managed a nod in her direction, his actions telling her what he couldn't say. Eddie looked torn. She'd seen this look before. _Mason_. She couldn't watch another of her friends killed in front of her.

"Eddie please, no…" she begged. "Not again…"

His eyes told her he understood. He hated it, he didn't like it, but he understood.

"See you soon Castille," she said with a small smile as she swung and made contact with the first of at least four strigoi.

 ** _END FLASHBACK…_**

"Oh go to hell," she spat as icy fingers trail their way down her cheek.

"Oh my dear, dear girl," he taunts, "why we're already there. Well, you are at least," his cackle filling the small, damp yet brightly lit room as he approached her slumped and broken body holding a long thin blade.

"On your feet," he demanded.

"If it's all the same to you, I think I'll sit," her voice weary but filled with that sarcastic Rose Hathaway wit.

Her defiance is rewarded with a fierce back hand to the face before she is hauled to her feet by the ropes that bind her wrists. Rose can't help the groan of pain that escapes her lips.

"Need I remind you what happened the last time you disobeyed me?!" her captor roared before a thick metal pole connected with her leg. The searing pain told Rose instantly that it was broken.

It took her a moment to realise the screams filling the room were her own as he ran the blade down the length of her torso, deeper than he had before, blood spilling rapidly towards the floor.

As Rose struggled to breathe through the pain, not wanting to give this sick and twisted monster the satisfaction of hearing her scream in agony, she could have sworn she could hear things crashing around from above. She quickly realised she wasn't the only one, as her captor ordered his two equally sick minions to check it out.

Rose tried to squash the feeling steadily building within her; this couldn't be a rescue, no one knew where she was. She couldn't afford to let herself think she was getting out of this, only to have those hopes ripped apart when B1 and B2 came back downstairs reporting a mere conflict between fellow strigoi.

"WHERE IS SHE?"

The voice sounded so distant, so far away but Rose had heard it. So had the filth holding the knife.

Seconds later the door flew open as one of the strigoi guards came barreling back through yelling something about a Guardian attack. Before he could respond, two strigoi I didn't recognize came falling through the already somewhat broken ceiling, necks snapped and stakes to the heart. Everything happened in slow motion then as Rose's captor began yelling at his accomplice to fight, and then, suddenly, he was there, charging down the hallway like death in a cowboy duster. _Dimitri._ Rose watched as his hands made quick work of the filth before him, leaving only her torturer, but he was no match for the clearly pissed Russian guardian.

"I need a medic now," he roared, sliding to his knees before me.

Rose couldn't stop the tears that started to flow, a combination of pain, utter relief that she was going home and the elation her heart felt at seeing Dimitri again. "You're here," she whispered.

"Roza," he soothed as he quickly lifted her in his arms, ropes discarded amidst her cries of pain, and carried her from hell.

"Stay with me Roza, please," he begged but she didn't have the strength the stop the shadows that were coming thick and fast.

"Love you…" she barely whispered before succumbing to the darkness.

 **To be continued…**

 **So... should I continue? Any interest here? Feel free to leave a review and your thoughts :) Cheers!**


	2. Chapter 2

**First off I'd like to thank everyone for their reviews and encouragement, as well as those who have added this story to their alerts. I appreciate it very much :)**

 **Secondly, and very importantly, I need to thank the awesome Llaria6 who kindly accepted to Beta this chapter for me. Her feedback is supportive and her command for writing is brilliant. Be sure to check out her fantastic work! Thank you again!**

 **Just to explain a little more... _A Guardian's Love_ is essentially a love story. It will tell the story of Dimitri and Rose's relationship through flashbacks. Now all good love stories have their up's and down's, so please stay with me. I have taken a few liberties so while there will be elements of Richelle Mead's fantastic books, the bulk will be my own. She own's it all...I'm just visiting and borrowing a little :)**

 **I really hope you'll stick with me! I'll be updating as much as I can between work and being a wife and Mummy :)**

 **Please leave a review if you have a minute or two. As I said, your thoughts are greatly appreciated.**

 **Happy reading :)**

 **A Guardian's Love**

 **Chapter Two**

… _ **Dimitri…**_

It had been three days since he'd heard her voice. Three days since he'd rescued her and carried her from that dungeon battered and bleeding. He'd never felt such hatred towards strigoi as he had that day. He'd wanted to rip them limb from limb. The sight of the woman he loved laying practically naked on the floor, her body covered in bruises and blood. He'd never forget the blood. It was everywhere. How she was still breathing was a miracle. Lissa had tried to heal her but could only do so much. Her injuries were extensive, from broken bones and multiple fractures to internal bleeding. They had almost lost her during surgery. He tightened his grasp on her unmoving hand, watching her chest rise and fall. She looked so fragile.

"How is she?"

Dimitri lifted his head to see Christian standing in the doorway, hands in his pockets. He seemed unsure if he should enter. "No change. All they keep staying is she's stable for now."

He nodded as Dimitri gestured toward the empty chair filling the small space on the other side of the bed. The amount of equipment crammed into the small area hadn't left much space for anything else. It was a basic room, much to Abe's dismay. He'd tried to have her moved back to Court, but the simple fact was that she was in no condition to be anywhere but here, in this sterile white box, in the intensive care unit at the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania. Thankfully, Dr. Hathrani was a close friend of Dr. Olendzki and her team had dealt with Dhampir and Moroi in the past.

Dimitri watched as Christian slumped himself down into the worn looking chair. He looked just as tired as Dimitri felt. "How is Vasilisa? Is she doing okay?" the Guardian asked, feeling a little guilty for not having checked on her sooner.

"She's sleeping. Healing Rose, it… um… it took it out of her," answered Christian quietly.

No one had dared stop her that day, as Rose lay dying on that blood soaked gurney, doctors and nurses running from all directions trying desperately to keep her breathing, her heart beating. Not caring who saw, Vasilisa stood beside her broken and battered best friend and held her hand in her own. Dimitri could do nothing but watch. He'd never felt so helpless. All of Rose's superficial injuries slowly disappeared before everyone's eyes, but still the monitor's consistent beep rang out, her heartbeat slowing to non-existent. Time seemed to stand still. She couldn't be dead. Moments later Vasilisa had collapsed to the floor as Dimitri was supported by Eddie, Christian holding the Queen in his arms. The unmistakable sound of a heartbeat filled the room. It was slow and it was faint, but it was there. Rose was still alive, hanging on by a thread.

Silence.

"Rose Hathaway is the strongest person I know," offered Christian quietly. "Not that I'd ever tell her that to her face because god knows she'd never let me forget it," he added half-heartedly. "She's going to wake up soon and start demanding chocolate donuts."

For the first time in days, a small smile tugged at the corner of Dimitri's mouth as he recalled the many times he had seen Roza devour more than one chocolate donut. "She does have a thing for chocolate donuts."

Suddenly Christian laughed out loud, the sound filling the small room. "Do you remember the night that Guardian Novice Nicolai Alexander took the only chocolate donut from the tray at dinner? The look on her face as he downed it right in front of her," he sighed, his hands coming to rest upon the top of his head. "I don't think I've ever seen him run so fast and not know why he was being chased."

Dimitri smiled. "Only to run straight into me and then use me as a human shield," he added.

"I think anyone who has met Rose now realises that if they are in her line of fire, their only saving grace comes in the form of Dimitri Belikov," joked Christian, clearly unable to hide his amusement.

Dimitri sighed inwardly as he was reminded that, jokes aside, she was his saving grace as much as he was hers. So many times it had been Rose, her presence alone keeping his façade of control in place. Had he really done enough to make sure she realised that?

He turned his attention back to Rose. How could he have ever walked away from her?

 _FLASHBACK…_

Dimitri had spent the better part of his shift thinking about Tasha's offer. Six months ago he doubted he would have hesitated. He'd always wanted his own family; a wife and children. But now things were complicated. Six months ago his world was flipped on its head as a whirlwind named Rose Hathaway came charging into his Groundhog Day life. She was as equally frustrating as she was beautiful and he'd been mesmerised by her since that night he first met her in Portland. She could be reckless and didn't think things through, and it made her both vulnerable and yet lethal. It was part of what made him love her.

He made his way through the darkened courtyard, the sound of the gentle falling rain filling his ears, the light breeze touching his face. A refreshing breeze was not something living in Russia offered.

As if he'd run into some invisible wall, Dimitri stopped suddenly halfway across the courtyard as a very familiar scent floated on the breeze. It was a scent that consumed him. He turned his head towards the weeping willow that lead out towards the field, his eyes falling on the trunk of the tree. _Roza._

He couldn't help but mentally scold her for breaking curfew again. His pace had slowed as he reached her somewhat concealed position.

"Rose, what are you doing out here?" He had tried to keep his tone light.

At first she didn't answer. Silence hung in the air.

Her voice was soft and quiet. "Why is it always you who seems to find me?"

Her response threw him. It's not what he was expecting at all. There was no sarcastic, quick whited response. Instead there was a sense of sadness in her voice and she wouldn't even look in his direction.

"Two other Guardians have walked right past and nothing. One of them was Guardian Alto and we both know he'd do anything to scold my ass," she added, her voice sullen. "Yet you see me from the other side of the courtyard. You always find me."

Her sad demeanour made him uneasy. He had not seen her like this before, their last conversation taking a far different road. She had been fierce and rude, and he'd called her out. She was right though. He did always find her. It was like he was drawn to her, like a moth to a flame.

But he shouldn't be.

He steeled himself, putting his guardian mask back up as he crouched down just off to her side. "Why are you out here Rose?"

She still wouldn't look at him. "I couldn't sleep."

"So you thought you would sit outside in the rain and freeze to death?" he questioned, arching a brow.

He watched as she blinked, seeming to snap out of her daydream and take in what she was wearing; shorts and a singlet. Even her feet had been bare.

"I didn't...I didn't really stop to think about that," she murmured before looking at him for the first time.

Her eyes didn't have their usual sparkle. They hadn't had that sparkle since before Spokane. He knew she still blamed herself for Mason Ashford's death.

Without a second thought, he stood and removed his duster before draping it around her, her eyes never leaving his.

"Before you freeze."

"Thank you," her voice so quiet he barely hears her.

He resumed his position to the side of her. "Now how about you tell me why you can't sleep."

She studied him momentarily. "You want to talk to me?"

He frowned, confused. "Why wouldn't I want to talk to you Roza?"

He couldn't be sure, but he was fairly certain a faint smile appeared on her face before it was quickly replaced by sadness once again. "We haven't just talked in ages. We usually just fight."

He gave her a sidelong look. "Do you want to fight?"

"No. I hate fighting with you. Verbally I mean. I don't mind the gym."

He couldn't help the small smile that crept over his lips. "I don't like fighting with you either."

He continued to watch her closely as suddenly her eyes glazed over and she slipped away. He'd seen this happen enough to not panic.

A few moments later she gasped as she slipped back out, squinting her eyes.

"God dammit! Make it stop!" she cursed angrily, as her palms pressed against her forehead.

"Roza, what's wrong. Is there something wrong with the princess?" he asked, instantly on alert.

She didn't answer him though, instead dropping her head.

"Rose?"

"Why does it always have to be about her? Why?" she questioned angrily.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"You really want to know why I can't sleep, Dimitri." It was only been then that he had noticed the tears in her eyes. "I can't sleep because no matter how hard I try not to, no matter how much I don't want to, I'm still drawn into Lissa's head! Oh and you want to know if she's okay? She's perfectly fine. She's with Christian. They're having sex for the first time. I don't need to see that."

Her hands moved to her face as she rubbed them up and down, as if trying to diffuse her anger. Dimitri opened his mouth to speak but was cut off.

"You know what I hate? I hate that she gets that moment. I hate that she has the chance to openly love the person her heart's chosen. There's no hiding. No pretending it isn't there. She can give herself to that person." Her eyes bore into his.

He instantly knew that she was referring to their 'relationship' or lack thereof.

"And then there's me," her eyes glistened with unshed tears. "Funnily enough, what people say about me couldn't be any further from the truth." She looked so vulnerable. This wasn't his Roza.  
"I'm not the blood whore everyone thinks I am," she said defensively before pulling her eyes from his and looking down at her hands. "I'm just a stubborn pain in the ass who embarrasses people."

It took every ounce of Dimitri's self-control to not show how angry those comments made him. His jaw ached from clenching it so tightly, while had his nails been longer, his palms would have bled from the crushing fists he had formed to stop himself from hitting the tree Rose leant against. He did not want to scare her. Moments of silence filled the space around them before her small voice broke through.

"Is that why you're leaving?"

He felt like he'd just been taken down, hard. How did she know?

"Roza how-"

"Guardian Belikov? Rose?" It was Alberta.

What are the chances? Dimitri stood slowly but not before noticing Rose discretely wipe away the tears that had fallen.

Guardian mask in place, he turned to face Alberta, explaining that Rose needed some fresh air having woken from a nightmare. Given all that she had been through in Spokane it was quite plausible.

"I was just about to escort her back to her room, where she will stay," he added the later for effect and to hopefully throw off any suspicions Alberta may have had.

Voicing her agreement, Alberta asked that Rose visit her office at lunch time tomorrow.

"I'll be there, but can I eat first?" came Roza's voice from behind Dimitri, where she still sat against the trunk of the tree.

He couldn't help the smirk that crept over his face while Alberta all out laughed, before assuring her she could eat first, then walked away in the direction of her office.

And then they were alone again. Silence.

The sound of Rose getting to her feet made Dimitri turn around. "I think I'll go back to my room now," she said softly as she handed him back his duster. "Thanks for the chat."

"Roza wait, I didn't know how-" but she was already walking away.

"You should take it," her voice was just loud enough for him to hear.

Dimitri can't help but flinch knowing exactly what she was referring to.

"What?"

"Tasha's offer. You should take her up on it. It's a really great chance."

It was because he knew her so well that he could hear the tears in her voice that she was desperately trying to keep at bay. "Rose…"

"It's ok, I get it." She turned to face him, walking backwards, slowly shaking her head. "She's everything I'm not and she's not a child, plus she can give you a baby. It's something I know you've always wanted. How can I compete with that?" Her voice broke and the tears begin to fall.

He made to move towards her but she held up her hands, crying out as she sobbed. "No. Please don't. It's hard enough already. I...I hope you'll be really happy. Merry Christmas Guardian Belikov."

And then she was gone and Dimitri was left confused and torn. What was he supposed to do? He wanted, no he needed to protect her. He couldn't be selfish.

 _END FLASHBACK_

"Dimitri…Dimitri…Dimitri…"

Movement caught his eye, Christian waving his hand back and forth. "I'm... I'm sorry what did you say?" murmured Dimitri.

Christian's look said it all. His eyes scrutinizing Dimitri, concern written all over his face.

Dimitri was an internal mess, yes. But he had to stay strong for her. "I'm fine. Just remembering." It was clear Christian didn't believe him. Hell, even he didn't believe him.

Dimitri sighed. That night he'd made the biggest mistake of his life. He'd left her. He'd left her alone for months when she had needed him most. It was a desperate middle of the night phone call from Christian that had brought him back, but in all honesty, Dimitri didn't think he could have stayed away much longer. That was over a year ago.

"I don't think I ever thanked you," murmured Dimitri, running his hands over his face, his growing beard making itself known against his palms.

"What for exactly?" asked Christian, evidently confused.

"I left because I thought it was what was best for Rose. I couldn't risk her future," the guilt he held over his choice was evident in his sullen voice. "At least that's what I kept telling myself for months. And then you called me. If you hadn't called…" his voice trailed off at the mere thought of what could have happened.

"Well I'll admit, it wasn't your greatest moment," he said hesitantly. "But, at the risk of sounding like a girl, you're a match made in heaven, or somewhere. If anyone was going to save her, it was going to be you." Dimitri looked up as Christian reached into his pocket pulling out a worn looking envelope. "She begged me to make sure you got this, before she…um," he stumbled. "I'm sorry I didn't remember sooner. With everything else that's happened, Lissa, the questioning, I…"

Dimitri watched as Christian stood and moved around to the foot of the bed. "I'm sorry," he repeated, holding out the envelope, but not coming any closer. "I…I think it's a letter but I don't know. I mean, I didn't open it or anything, I just figured…"

By now Dimitri was standing intimidatingly in front of his charge. He was a great deal taller than Christian Ozera. He held out his hand, cutting Christian off mid-sentence. "Thank you."

He stood unmoving for a moment, the envelope in his hands, Roza's messy scrawl spelling out _Comrade_.

Christian patted him on the shoulder, albeit cautiously. They'd become more than just a Guardian and his charge. They'd become good friends, although Dimitri knew Christian still found him somewhat intimidating.

"She'll wake up, Dimitri. She's too damn stubborn not too," he added offering a small smile, one that Dimitri couldn't help but return.

He was left alone to his thoughts once more as Christian left to check on the Queen. Envelope in hand, Dimitri slowly lifted the tab on the back. His heart almost stopped as alarms pierced through the silence. The envelope slipped from his hands as he watched in dismay as Rose's body convulsed before him. Within seconds the room was full of medical personnel, Dr. Hathrani included.

Dimitri suddenly found his voice. ""What's going on? You said she was stable!" No one answered him. "Roza!"

Christian, who had raced back into the room, did his best to restrain Dimitri and get him out of the way.

"Her drainage bag is full of blood!" yelled a nurse above the chaos.

"She's got a bleed, someone call surgery," was Dr. Hathrani's matter of fact reply. "Tell them we're on our way now!"

"Why is she bleeding? What's happening? Tell me now!" he all but roared, as his fist put a large hole in the wall behind him. His growing fear at being unable to help Rose as she writhed viciously and uncontrolled on the bed, only served to escalate his anger.

And then Rose stopped. Her body was still as if nothing had happened at all. But the sound of her heart flat-lining made it all too real that something had happened and it wasn't good.

All Dimitri could do was watch in vain, helpless to do anything at all, as the team around Roza fought to keep her with them. He tried to push past Christian to get closer, but he blocked his path imploring Dimitri to let them work. Instead he paced, his hands in his hair. He watched as Dr. Hathrani straddled Roza's once strong and lethal body, her hands pumping her chest with compression after compression. "Let's move, let's move!"

Easily breaking free from Christian's hold, Dimitri pushed his way through the nurses, grasping Rose's hand in his own as he moved alongside the rapidly moving bed, the doctor's compressions never faltering. "Don't you leave me, I'm not done making it up to you yet. You hear me? I'm not done. I love you Roza…"

And then she was gone, her small hand slipping from his as they wheeled her through the swinging doors to surgery.

 _ **To be continued…**_

 _Please share your thoughts :)_


	3. Chapter 3

**IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE: I would just like to acknowledge now, before you start reading, that I have used three scenes from Richelle Mead's Vampire Academy within this chapter. Now while I have changed a few bits and pieces here and there, these scenes and much of the dialogue used within remain hers, I am simply borrowing them as they fit within my story and worked best as they were, rather than anything I could have written. I hope you understand :)**

 **A Guardian's Love**

 **Chapter Three**

… _ **Rose…**_

THE SHADOWS CONTINUED to wrap themselves around the young woman's body as she stood looking around trying to figure out where she was.

"Rose…"

She heard her name float quietly across the dark and thickening shadows.

"Rose…"

That voice.

She turned her head towards the voice again. "Hello?"

Nothing.

Rose looked around. There was nothing but shadows. Where was she? Hell? No. This couldn't be hell. Wasn't it supposed to have bad guys and flames and a big scary demonic looking man who answered to Satan, holding a pitchfork?

"Rose…"

Maybe she was losing her mind. Maybe she was in such a deep sleep after being rescued that she was dreaming. Maybe she was…dead.

"Am I dead?" she called out curiously as if expecting an answer. "Because if I am, I've got to say, this is nothing like the brochure," she deadpanned. "I mean, seriously, where are the donuts?"

There was no response. She was just about to call out again when movement amongst the shadows in the distance caught her eye.

"Who's there?" her strong voice was hiding the sense of fear growing in her stomach. Where in God's name was she?

Her body tensed as a lone figure parted the thick fog of shadows, each step bringing it closer.

"It's time Rose," said the voice.

The young Guardian had no response. She stood motionless, her mind reeling. She was speechless, which for Rose Hathaway, was quite the feat. "I…what…I don't…" her voice holding not a trace of humour as she stuttered.

The figure came to a halt a few feet from her. She blinked repeatedly, for within her reach stood Mason Ashford, looking very undead. Her eyes took in every inch of him from his feet back up to his head, which appeared to be very much intact. His clothes were neat and tidy, his red hair brushed down neatly atop his head just like it always had been. His eyes. She lingered on his piercing blue eyes. They were peaceful and welcoming, nothing like the fearful and wide eyed pair that were burned into her memory. She would never forget those eyes.

"I watched you die," she whispered sorrowfully. "Your neck, he…he snapped your neck."

Mason nodded. "Yes."

Rose Hathaway was not easily confused. But right now, she was as confused as hell.

"I don't understand…I can see…" she trailed off. "Oh god, I'm seeing ghosts aren't I? Great. That's just great! People already think I'm nuts, why not throw in a few ghosts? Keep things interesting," she said exasperated, throwing her hands up in defeat.

Mason only smiled sadly at her.

She stared at him, still in a state of disbelief. It took a moment but as realisation dawned on her, she was unable to stop the small but audible gasp that left her mouth. "I really am dead, aren't I?"

"You're in shadows," was his simple reply.

"Shadows?" questioned Rose, her face scrunched up in confusion.

He lifted his hands and gestured to the shadows around them. "You're on the precipice between the living and the dead. You're in shadows."

"Why am I here? Why are you here?" she asked still profoundly confused.

He smiled gently. "I'm here for you."

She gave him sidelong look. "Here for me how exactly?"

"To walk you through your memories."

"Memories?" She shook her head. "Isn't that just a nice way of saying your life is going to flash before your eyes, and then bam, you're dead?"

Mason lowered his head.

She was right. Oh my god, this isn't happening.

"I'm pretty messed up aren't I?" she whispered.

"I'm surprised you've lasted thing long," he lifted his eyes to hers, a faint smile tugging at his lips.

This was really happening and it would seem like there was nothing she could do to stop it. Rose was suddenly overcome by a wave of emotion, as it hit home that she would likely never see her friends and family again. She would never see Dimitri again. She would never hear his voice.

"Just close your eyes. Close your eyes and listen for his voice. He's there," Mason instructed softly.

It was as if he could read her mind and sensed the growing fear and anguish rising to her chest. He reached out and gently held her hand. Rose was amazed that she could feel it. "It's okay. We can wait a few more minutes. Just close your eyes, Rose."

With unshed tears in her eyes, she did as he instructed, thinking of Dimitri.

Seconds of silence grew and grew. Nothing. She waited, thinking of nothing and no-one but Dimitri. And then there it was. The sound of his voice enveloped her. She drank it in, relishing in its smoothness and the comfort and safety it brought. She listened to his voice and it was as if he were right next to her. Another voice joined Dimitri's. Rose focused. Christian. She listened as Dimitri thanked the Moroi for calling him back to The Academy. To her. Her heart broke as she listened to the guilt in his voice. She wished he could let go of it. Rose had forgiven him long ago. In that moment she knew she would give anything to tell him that, just one last time.

"Rose. Rose it's time now," Mason's voice slowly pulled her away from Dimitri's voice.

"I'm sorry Rose, but we can't wait any longer. It's time to go," he said regretfully.

She was silent as she let this news sink in.

She'd given a lot of thought over the years as to how she would die. She had always imagined it would be in battle, quick and over and done with, and she'd rest easy with the knowledge that she had fulfilled her role. But this. She never expected this.

"I don't want to," she said suddenly.

"I'll be right here," he answered supportively as he took her hand in his.

Suddenly Rose gasped as without warning, she was drawn into her memories.

 _"We've got to run for it," Rose instructed, as she clutched at Vasilisa's arm._

 _"But you can't –"_

 _"Run."_

 _It took every ounce of Rose's willpower not to pass out on the sidewalk. Her body didn't want to run after losing blood, but she had no choice, as she ordered her muscles to stop bitching and clung to Lissa as their feet pounded against the concrete. In any other circumstance, Rose would have easily outrun Vasilisa without any extra effort, but tonight, she was wall that was holding Rose upright._

 _The heavy footsteps thundering behind them grew louder, closer, as black stars danced before the weakened Guardian's eyes. Just ahead, she could make out their target, the small green Honda that belonged to Jeremy. Oh god, she thought. If only they could just make it._

 _Ten feet from the car, a man stepped directly into their path. Both Rose and Vasilisa came to a screeching halt. Rose jerked Vasilisa back to her side as her vision cleared slightly. It was him. Without a doubt, she knew it was the guy she had seen across the street watching her. She couldn't help but look him over as she continued to hold her charge tightly to her still weakened frame. He was older than her, maybe mid-twenties and tall. He was very tall, probably six-six or six-seven, shoulder length brown hair, tied back in a short ponytail. Dark brown eyes and a long brown duster. Under different circumstances – say, when he wasn't holding up their desperate attempt to escape – Rose would have thought he was hot._

 _Rose blinked rapidly. His hotness was irrelevant now. He was the only obstacle keeping her and Lissa from the car and their freedom._

 _The on edge young woman also noticed that the thundering footsteps behind them had slowed, their pursuers had caught up. Off to the sides, she detected more movement, more people closing in. God. They'd sent almost a dozen Guardian's to drag them back to The Academy. Rose couldn't believe it. The Queen herself didn't travel with that many._

 _Panicked and not entirely in control of her own higher reasoning, Rose acted out of instinct, pushing Lissa behind her and away from the man in front who appeared to be the leader._

 _"Leave her alone," she growled. "Don't touch her."_

 _Rose watched the man carefully, his face was unreadable. He held out his hands in what she could only guess was supposed to be some sort of calming gesture, like he saw her as some wild animal he was planning to sedate. "I'm not going to –"_

 _He took a step forward._

 _In the next second Rose had launched an attack, leaping out in an offensive maneuver she hadn't used in two years. The move was stupid, another reaction born of instinct and fear. It was hopeless. This man was a skilled Guardian, not a Novice who hadn't finished his training. He also wasn't weak and on the verge of passing out. And man, was he fast. Rose had forgotten just how fast Guardians could be, how they could move and strike like cobras. The freakishly tall and clearly highly skilled Guardian knocked Rose off as if he was simply brushing away a fly, his hands slamming into her, sending her backwards. Unable to catch her footing, Rose was headed for the sidewalk, at a twisted angle, hip first. She knew it was going to hurt. A lot._

 _Only it didn't._

 _Just as quickly as he'd blocked her feeble and rash attack, the man reached out and caught her arm while his other hand gently grasped her waist, keeping her upright. When Rose had steadied herself, she noticed the man was staring at her, or more precisely, her neck. Still disoriented, she didn't get it right away. Then slowly, her free hand reached up to the side of her throat and lightly touched the wound Lissa has made earlier. Pulling her fingers back, she saw slick, dark blood on her skin. Embarrassed, she shook her hair so that it fell forward around her face. Her hair was long and thick and completely covered her neck. She had grown it out for precisely that reason._

 _She noticed his eyes lingered on the now-covered bite a moment longer before rising to meet her glare. She jerked out of his hold. He let her go, though Rose knew had he wanted to, he could easily restrain her all night. Fighting the rapidly rising nauseating dizziness, Rose backed towards Lissa, bracing herself for another attack. But before she could launch into another likely to fail attack, Lissa's hand caught hold of hers, quietly begging her not to. At first, her words had no effect, but then calming thoughts gradually began to settle in her mind, coming across through the bond. It wasn't exactly compulsion, she wouldn't use that on her, but it was effective, as was the simple fact that they were hopelessly outnumbered, and Rose was, well, outclassed. She knew struggling would be pointless and inevitably humiliating. Swallowing her pride, Rose sagged in defeat, her arms falling to her sides._

 _Seeming to sense Rose's resignation, the man stepped cautiously forward and turned his attention towards Lissa. His face was calm. "Princess Vasilisa Dragomir, my name is Dimitri Belikov," he spoke confidently. Rose could make out a faint Russian accent. "I've come to take you back to St. Vladimir's Academy…"_

Rose fell to the ground as she was pulled ungraciously from her memory of the night she had first met Dimitri Belikov.

Mason knelt beside her, hand on her shoulder. "I always wondered what really went down that night. Belikov wasn't really someone you wanted to mess with, but if anyone was going to do it, it was going to be you," he smirked.

Rose turned to face him, unshed tears pooling in her eyes, she tried to make light of the situation, smiling half-heartedly. "He handed me my ass that night."

This earnt a chuckle from Mason and he held her tighter.

As if it had just clicked, Rose looked at Mason wide eyed. "You can see my memories too?"

"Yes."

 _Oh._

"What memories are we going to re-live Mason?"

He didn't answer straight away, instead sitting himself down next to her, so that they were face to face, the shadows whirling around them. "They're your most significant memories, the ones that have brought you to where you are now."

 _Wonderful…_

This was going to hurt like hell. She'd felt the physical pain from that night in Portland as if it was happening in real time. But really, if she was honest, that wasn't what scared her. It was the emotional scars of her memories that scared her. It was knowing that she was going to relive moments with Dimitri that she treasured and also ones that she wished she could forget. And then there was Mason's death. Would she have to relive that? Would he?

She ran her hands up and over her face, pushing her loose hair through her fingers before securing it at the nape of her neck with her hands. "Well, this should be interesting then…"

Wasn't death supposed to be easy?

"I'm right here with you Rose…" Mason whispered soothingly, as he leant forward and pressed a kiss to her hair.

* * *

Moments later she gasped as another memory took hold, her hand reaching out for Mason's.

 _"…the best Guardians always had that bond, in the stories," said Dimitri off hand._

 _Rose watched as Kirova's outrage reignited at the Russian's words. "Stories that are centuries old," she exclaimed, hands flailing about. "Surely you aren't suggesting we let her stay at the Academy after everything she's done?"_

 _She turned her attention back to Guardian Belikov, who stood leaning up against the wall, arms crossed over his bulking chest._

 _Bulking chest? Where the hell had that come from?_

 _The Russian Guardian shrugged. "She might be wild and disrespectful, but she has potential –"_

 _Rose's brain caught up with what was being said. "Wild and disrespectful?" she interrupted, riled by his words. "Who the hell are you anyway? Outsourced help?"_

 _It was Kirova who answered. "Guardian Belikov is the Princess's Guardian now. Her sanctioned Guardian."_

 _"You got cheap foreign labour to protect Lissa!?"_

 _Rose somewhat regretted her outburst almost immediately since most Moroi and their Guardians were of Russian or Romanian descent._

 _Kirova threw her hands up in exasperation and turned towards Guardian Belikov. "You see? Completely undisciplined! All the psychic bonds and very raw potential in the world can't make up for that. A Guardian without discipline is worse than no Guardian."_

 _Not moving from his position against the wall, the somewhat intimidating Guardian merely motioned towards Rose with his hand. "So teach her discipline. Classes just started. Put her back in and get her training again."_

 _"Impossible. She'll still be hopelessly behind her peers."_

 _"No I won't," argued Rose from her chair in the middle of the room. No one listened to her._

 _"Then give her extra training sessions," he suggested._

 _This continued on while everyone else in the room watched the exchange like it was a tennis match. Rose's pride was still hurt after the events in Portland, but she was also quickly coming to realise that Dimitri Belikov could very well be what kept her here with Lissa. Better to be stuck in this hellhole than be without her._

 _Movement from the Russian pulled Rose back into the conversation about her immediate future, or lack thereof._

 _"Who's going to put in the extra time?" demanded Kirova. "You?"_

 _Rose found herself holding her breath as the stoic Guardian's argument came to an abrupt halt. "Well, that's not what I –"_

 _"Yes. That's what I thought," interrupted Kirova sounding very pleased with herself._

 _Rose on the other hand was desperate. In truth, she knew that Kirova could kick her out on her ass with a click of her fingers. Her eyes met Guardian Belikov's. He returned her gaze, his eyes boring into hers. She wasn't above begging at this point, mouthing 'please' so only he could see. Rose hoped her eyes told him just how much she needed to stay here with Lissa. She would do whatever the God standing across from her instructed – within Rose Hathaway reason – if it meant staying at the Academy with Lissa._

 _"Yes," he said finally. "I can mentor Rose. I'll give her extra sessions along with her normal ones…"_

Once again Rose was pulled from her memories, but this time there was no chance to recover, as she was immediately pulled into another.

 _"…Rose…"_

 _She would recognise that voice anywhere. It was like the warmth of her favourite blanket on a cold night, wrapping itself around her. Rose turned her head where she found Dimitri's dark eyes staring back at her from where he sat in the chair beside the bed she lay on. She noted his hair wasn't tied back. There was no denying he was good looking. Scrap that, he was hot. Like the kind of hot that makes you stop walking on the street and get hit by traffic. Rose was crushing on her mentor. Her older, twenty-four year old mentor._

 _"Hey," said Rose wearily, her voice coming out as a croak._

 _Dimitri smiled. "How do you feel?"_

 _"Weird. Kind of groggy."_

 _"Dr. Olendzki gave you something for the pain. You seemed pretty bad when we brought you in."_

 _Rose shook her head slowly. "I don't remember that…how long have I been out?"_

 _"A few hours," he answered simply._

 _Wow._

 _"Must have been strong drugs. Must still be strong," she added blinking._

 _Some of the details began to seep back into her consciousness. The bench. Her ankle getting caught. Tentatively, she tried to move her toes. "I don't hurt at all."_

 _Rose looked at him as he shook his head. "No. Because you weren't seriously injured."_

 _The sound of her ankle cracking came back to her. "Are you sure? I remember…the way it bent. The crack. No. Something must be broken," she said managing to sit up and take a better look at her ankle. "Or at least sprained."_

 _Dimitri moved quickly to stop her. "Be careful."_

 _Rose carefully shifted herself to the edge of the bed and looked down. Her jeans were cut open to just below her knee, revealing not much more than an ankle that, other than looking a little red, appeared perfectly normal. "Well God, I got lucky. If I'd hurt it, it would have put me out of practice for a while. My jeans on the other hand…"_

 _Relieved, Rose looked over to Dimitri, who had now returned to his chair. He smiled. She loved his smile. "I know. You kept telling me that while I was carrying you. You were very upset."_

 _Rose swallowed. "You…you carried me here?"_

 _"Yes. After we broke the bench apart and freed your foot."_

 _Rose found herself swept up in the image of Dimitri holding her in his arms, except in her vision, the badass, god like Guardian was shirtless. Suddenly, as if someone had upended a bucket of ice water all over her, the reality of the situation hit her. She groaned._

 _"Rose?"_

 _"I was taken down by a bench. A bench," she laughed without humour, looking at her hands. "I survived the whole day guarding Lissa, then I come back here and meet my downfall in the form of a bench." She groaned again. "Do you know how embarrassing that is? And in front of all those guys, too."_

 _"It wasn't your fault," he offered. "No one knew the bench was rotted. It looked fine."_

 _"Still," she pouted. "I should have just stuck to the sidewalk like a normal person. The other novices are going to give me shit when I get back."_

 _Rose chanced a look at him. His lips held back a smile. Their eyes lingered on one another a moment before Dimitri leaned forward slowly. "Maybe presents will cheer you up?"_

 _She immediately sat up straighter. "Presents?"_

 _The smile he'd been trying to keep at bay, escaped. He handed her a small box with a piece of paper. "This is from Prince Victor."_

 _Rose was surprised. Very surprised. She read the note that was hastily scrawled in pen._

 _Rose –_

 _I'm very happy to see you didn't suffer any serious injuries form your fall. Truly, it is a miracle. You lead a charmed life, and Vasilisa is lucky to have you._

 _"That's nice of him," she said, placing the note on the bed beside her, before opening the box. "Whoa. Very nice," she corrected as she saw what was inside._

 _She lifted the rose necklace that Lissa had wanted to get her but couldn't afford. She held it up, looping its chain over her hand causing the glittering, diamond-covered rose to hang free._

 _"Not to sound unappreciative, but this is pretty extreme for a get-well present," said Rose cautiously. "I mean, the price on this thing…"_

 _"He actually bought it in honour of you doing so well on your first day as an official Guardian. He saw you and Vasilisa looking at it," explained Dimitri._

 _Rose let that sink in for a moment. "Wow." She shook her head. "I don't think I did that good of a job."_

 _"I do."_

 _Rose was fairly certain she was blushing and couldn't bring herself to meet his gaze. Grinning, like a kid who had just been let loose in a candy store, Rose carefully placed the necklace back in its box and set it on a nearby table. "You did say 'presents,' right? Like more than one?"_

 _The small room filled with the rich sound of Dimitri's laugh. God, she loved his laugh. It wrapped around her like a caress. "I like you're laugh…"_

 _A part of her deep down hoped he remembered that moment in the gym, following her feeble and failed surprise attack. She didn't need to wait long to find out, the humour in his eyes confirming that he did._

 _"I know you do, Roza," he replied giving her one of those carefree smiles that she loved to see and calling her Roza. "This is from me."_

 _Rose was both puzzled and excited as she slowly took the small, plain bag from his outstretched hand, and opened it up. Her heart swelled, as in her hand sat a brand new tube of her favourite lip gloss. She'd complained to him a number of times how she was running out, but she'd never thought he was paying attention._

 _"How'd you manage to buy this? I saw you the whole time at the mall?" she asked, shaking her head._

 _"Guardian secrets," was all he said._

 _"What's this for? My first day?"_

 _"No," he answered simply, shaking his head. "Because I thought it would make you happy."_

 _Without even a second thought, she leaned forward and hugged him. "Thank you."_

 _Judging by his stiff posture, Rose had clearly caught him by surprise. Hell, she'd caught herself by surprise too. But a few moments later she felt him relax. She almost died a happy death when she felt his hands reach around her and slide across her lower back, returning the embrace._

 _"I'm glad you're better," he said softly. His mouth sounded like it was almost in her hair, just above her ear. "When I saw you fall…"_

 _Rose couldn't help but snort. "You thought, 'Wow, she's a loser."_

 _Gee Rose, much like now? Way to ruin the moment._

 _"That's not what I thought."_

 _Dimitri pulled back slightly, his face coming into view, but he didn't say anything. His eyes were so dark and deep that Rose wanted to dive right in. Staring at them made her feel warm all over, like they had flames inside. Slowly, carefully, his long fingers reached out and began to trace the edge of her cheekbone, moving up the side of her face. At the first touch of his skin meeting hers, Rose shivered. Her eyes, which had remained glued to his, lowered to his lips as he wound a lock of her hair around one finger, just like he had in the gym. Rose swallowed as she contemplated what it would be like to kiss him. It was a thought that both excited and scared her, which was stupid. It wasn't as if she'd never been kissed before. Yet the thought of him closing the distance and bringing his lips to hers made the world start spinning. She slowly dragged her eyes from his lips to find him staring at her. His eyes held a look she hadn't seen before. Was he thinking the same thing? But there was no time to mull over that, as a soft at the door had them both hastily moving away from one another…_

* * *

"This is cruel," she gasped. "I feel like I'm meeting him and losing him all at once."

Rose wrapped her arms tighter around herself. It was as if the thick fog of shadows surrounding her was made of snow. She felt so cold.

"Come here," Mason encouraged, edging closer to her, opening his arms.

They sat there in silence, a few minutes passing as the fog continued to whirl around them, Rose curled into Mason's embrace in an attempt to keep warm.

"I never really stood a chance, did I?" Mason asked quietly.

"What?"

"Belikov. You loved him from then, didn't you? You fell in love with him then," he questioned softly. His tone was gentle, but the hurt was there, hiding beneath the surface.

"Yes," she answered, her voice nothing more than a whisper.

When he didn't reply Rose gently moved herself out of his arms and turned to face him. "I'm sorry, Mason."

He smiled half-heartedly before looking at her. "Don't be. At least I got to kiss you once or twice."

Despite her sadness, Rose couldn't help but laugh at him. She truly had missed him since he'd died. "Yes, yes you did."

And with Mason's smile filling her vision, she was pulled forcefully back into her memories once more.

 _ **To be continued…**_

 _ **Author's Note:**_

 _ **Thank you so much for reading! Once again, a massive thank you to Llaria6 for her time, thoughts and being my awesome dictionary and grammatical support! Be sure to check out her works! She is amazing!**_

 _ **I would love to hear your thoughts. It's your reviews that make this little hobby of mine even more enjoyable!**_


End file.
